Pre-Ireland Thoughts

I am sitting in the Chicago O’Hare airport.  Ok, strike that.  I am now on the plane from O’Hare to London Heathrow. It’s nearly one thirty a.m. our time, and I’ve spent the last five hours trying to sleep in the middle airplane seat. Gah.  We had so much turbulence at one point that an alarm was sounding, and I was gripping my arm rests wondering if the people on either side of me would be the last two people I ever had a conversation with.  I was nearly hysterical.  Luckily, that ended after about 30 minutes.  Oh, and I did spend the first hour of the  flight seriously trying to figure a plan of action in case I really just wanted to be home for the summer and didn’t want to travel to a foreign country to live with random strangers by myself for seven weeks.  However, that also passed, and now I am groggy and hungry with a side of get-me-off-this-plane-asap-please.  I think this trip is going to be good, at least I hope it’s going to be.  I will be landing in London soon and from there I will be taking a plane to Dublin.  Once in Dublin, I will take a bus to Limerick where the older couple I am first staying with is picking me up.  Throughout the summer, I am volunteering through an organization called Help X.  I am not traveling with anyone, and I am not meeting up with anyone I know or have ever met.  Helpx.net allows for people, through a small annual fee, to post profiles about themselves and connect for volunteer and travel purposes.  It exists in almost every country worldwide, including in the United States.  It’s a great way for younger people to travel cheaply, do good, and learn more about another country’s culture by not only being the tourist.  I am really excited about the theme I am traveling with, which is green, self-sustaining living.  At the first place I am staying at, I will help an older couple repaint their home, maintain their garden, and do small jobs around the house.  I am looking forward to hiking on the weekends and attending a book festival with them.  After two weeks, on June 16, I am traveling from Limerick to County Laois by bus.  In County Laois I am staying with a man named Peter and his wife, along with two other girls my age.  Originally I thought the girls were going to be international as well, but I think they are coming from Limerick.  Peter’s farm is a 100 cow dairy farm, and I’m not exactly sure what that means for me, but I think that definitely means interesting blog stories.  I have never milked a cow.  I have never cleaned out a barn.  I am probably not cut out for that job, but I guess what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.  I will repeat that to myself when I’m knee deep in…never mind.  On July 1, after two weeks at the dairy farm, I will be traveling to Killarney, a city near Kerry, to stay for my last three weeks at a blueberry farm.  I think I’m most looking forward to staying there because it’s a couple with three kids, two who are in college and one who is 16.  I imagine I will feel most comfortable there, and I think working on a blueberry farm will be delightful.  They also mentioned that they might need someone to do PR-type of work for them.  Plus, for the first time this year, they are going to be offering classes to teach people how to live more self-sustaining lives, and I am able to take the classes for free.  How the financial part of my trip works is that I have to pay for my flight to Ireland and the bus fares to get to the different farms, but once I’m there, I’m essentially cost-free.  They provide me with food and en-suite living; I think one of them even mentioned that I’ll be staying in a guest house.  They allow me to use their laundry facilities and will maybe even let me borrow family cars.  I’m not sure exactly how that will all pan out, but I guess that’s part of the excitement.  On July 19 I begin the long journey home and arrive, if everything goes as planned, in Chicago on July 20 at 10:30 a.m.  I’m nervous, but I’m also really excited at the prospect of meeting new friends and becoming my own, independent person again.  I’ve always been independent to some extent, but every since I’ve met Brendan, I’ve had much less of an urge to do things on my own.  Even now, I wish he was with me.  But, I never want to look back and regret him or experiences I didn’t have.  I want to be completely who I need to be before we get married.  And I think it’ll make our relationship more interesting for us to have separate life experiences to tell each other about; a little mystery is good.  I’m a little scared – not that we’ll not make it or that we’ll find someone else but that I’ve become so dependent on him that doing this is a breaking point for me.  Deep down I hope I discover a better, stronger me and am individually someone other people really like and enjoy getting to know.  I know I am that person, but at Butler everyone has only ever known us together, and that’s where our life mainly is now.  Plus, all I seem to talk about these days is wedding stuff; I love thinking and dreaming about it, but I think it’ll be good to take a break from all that for a little while.  A few side notes – when did I become so paranoid about my luggage?  I am toting a large Adidas duffle bag, a heavy backpack, and my loaded down purse everywhere.  Going to the bathroom is probably how a mother of six feels.  And, I am getting smarter about how I treat my body while traveling.  For example, I know that I need to eat healthy and that I am more prone to getting dehydrated.  So I packed unsalted almonds, dried cranberries, and Cliff bars.  I even splurged in the airport to buy a Powerade.  I don’t feel awesome right now, but I’m sure I would feel worse if I hadn’t done that.  Also, some of the guys from the band Styx are on my flight. Pretty cool.